COLLEGE PSYCHOLOGISTS
BOUNDARIES: THE NEW SELF-CARE
Term 3 is always a very busy term for our students and at this stage of the term, assignment deadlines are creeping up and exams are looming. This is the time of year where our most asked question in the counselling department is “how do I cope with the stress and pressure of my assessments?”
Self-care is a strategy that is suggested to stressed and overwhelmed young people who are having difficulty managing the increase in workload around this time of year – but self-care is not as simple as it seems. Bubble-baths, walks on the beach and warm cups of tea are wonderful ways to care for yourself, but the real self-care buzz word right now is BOUNDARIES.
Setting boundaries, both with yourself and with others, is a way of honoring your space, your emotions, your goals and your priorities. Setting boundaries is about caring for yourself by ensuring that your needs are being met in order for you to be able to manage your stress, as opposed to some self-care strategies which are an escape and a distraction from the difficulties of the moment.
Here are 10 boundaries students can set for themselves this exam period, to help them thrive during this tricky time of year –
- Planning breaks and taking them – saying no to working until the point of exhaustion or taking breaks that are longer than the time spent working!
- Creating a healthy sleep routine – saying no to late-night distractions!
- Talking to yourself like you would talk to a friend – saying no to critical self-talk!
- Setting schedules and routines – saying no to study time with no focus, last minute assignments, forgotten opportunities to submit drafts and all-night cramming,
- Letting go of perfection – saying no to fixating on perfection and instead giving yourself permission to submit YOUR best work!
- Limiting caffeine – saying no to swapping sleep for energy drinks or cups of coffee!
- Saying goodbye to toxic relationships – saying no to friends who don’t encourage you to perform at your best, or friends who distract you with social drama!
- Sticking to your plan – saying no to additional demands on your time (where possible) such as extra shifts at work, shopping trips or late night Face-time chats.
- Fueling with food – saying no to food that makes you feel sleepy and unmotivated, and also saying no to working through meal times.
- Block, unfriend, delete – saying no to following social media accounts or downloading apps that make you feel sad, worried, angry or that take up all your time and saying no to “doom-scrolling” to make screen-time limited and productive!
Remember – setting boundaries means saying NO confidently, kindly and calmly, but it is still not always easy. These boundaries are only for a short window of time while you prepare and complete assessments, though some people find boundaries so freeing that they may want to hold on to them long term!
Be gentle with yourselves,
