Message from the Headmaster

‘We know that suffering produces perseverance; perseverance, character; and character, hope’

Romans 5:3b-4

Dear Students, Parents and Carers

We are all familiar with the concept of resilience, or in other words, “bounce back”, where we want our young people to be able to navigate disappointment rather than crumple at the first sign of difficulty. I see part of my role as keeping up as best I can with the academic literature and with developments related to childhood and adolescence. One interesting piece of research suggests that parental emotional expressiveness is a determinative factor in the presence or absence of childhood depression. Conflicts between the parent and the child increase the likelihood of depression (Wang et al., “Parental Emotional Expressiveness Affects Primary School Children’s Depression, Family Process, 2025”). Conversely, parents regulating their emotional expressiveness towards their children and endeavouring to make that as positive as possible promotes child wellbeing. While the findings may be challenging (which of us has never had an argument with our children?), they do indicate the importance of warm and affective relationships between parents and children, at least as the main frame of the relationship.

Recent research suggests that experience of trauma lodges in our DNA and hence can be passed on to children. With this in mind, many of us really need to develop in young people a hope which arises from struggling successfully with what life throws at us. The Apostle Paul put it this way: “We know that suffering produces perseverance; perseverance, character; and character, hope” (Romans 5:3b-4). The concept of hope is a very important one. It is easier to maintain with a telos, that is, a sense of purpose and confidence in the future, which certainly arises through a Christian frame and is more difficult to maintain when our worldview is entirely temporal and, therefore, transient.

Another piece of research-based writing takes the issue of resilience to a higher plane. Resilience suggests bouncing back and carrying on, whereas to develop the attribute of antifragility suggests students leveraging their difficulties to grow as people (Codrington, Developing Antifragility In Every School, February 2025). With this mindset, difficulties become an opportunity for personal growth. Such an attitude can assist the development of what has been called a psychological immune system. Such a view anticipates the inevitable difficulties that are common to all people but insists that they be overcome via a sense of forward progress. To adopt a more commonplace phrasing, we don’t attempt to “wrap children in cotton wool” but help them develop what Carol Dweck, an American researcher, calls ”a growth mindset”, where we are all seeking to develop our capacities further. This intent allies parents with School staff.

International Women’s Day

As a School, we have celebrated International Women’s Day with our boys by inviting two speakers to address them at the Assembly. Ms Linda Douglas, Principal of Wenona, reminded us of the recency of equal recognition of women in our society. The School Captain of Wenona, Zara Yee, grounded this in the practicalities of positive relationships between boys and girls.

From the standpoint of 2025, it is often forgotten that women have only had the right to vote for a little over 100 years, and it was only about 50 years ago that women who married were obliged to resign from their positions as teachers. Often, the optics and narrative of equality hide a lack of equality in practice. Shore honours the role of women. For boys to develop healthy masculinity, they need female as well as male mentors who model adult excellence. The struggle for equality for women is not yet over. At Shore, a little over 50 percent of our teachers are female, and hence, it is good for boys to experience female leadership in the classroom.

Community

I was delighted to see nearly 1,000 people braving the rain at our recent Icebreaker. The sense of community around Shore and for the sake of our students was immensely encouraging. The alignment of parents with staff, seen in many conversations on the night, is a significant joint endeavour. Thank you very much to all of those who were not deterred by the weather and found overhanging masonry in which to conduct their conversations.

Dr John Collier
Headmaster