{"id":3832,"date":"2020-06-24T10:49:34","date_gmt":"2020-06-24T00:49:34","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/www.thebuzz.net.au\/shore-boarding-news\/?post_type=article&#038;p=3832"},"modified":"2020-06-24T10:49:34","modified_gmt":"2020-06-24T00:49:34","slug":"boys-will-be-boys","status":"publish","type":"article","link":"https:\/\/www.thebuzz.net.au\/shore-boarding-news\/article\/boys-will-be-boys\/","title":{"rendered":"Boys Will Be Boys"},"content":{"rendered":"<p>A few years back, a good mate of mine and fellow Educator (Teacher), sent me an article titled \u201cRaising Resilient Kids\u2019, the author, Michael McQueen, makes reference to a term coined by Ivy Baker Priest, an American political figure, who said \u201cMy father had always said that there are four things a child needs \u2013 plenty of love, nourishing food, regular sleep and lots of soap and water \u2013 and after those, what they need most is some <strong>intelligent neglect<\/strong>.\u201d<\/p>\n<p>So what is <strong>\u2018Intelligent neglect\u2019<\/strong>?\u00a0 Let me explain in my typical, long winded way.\u00a0 Some of the greatest solutions to all things \u2018Global\u2019 have been solved around a campfire.\u00a0 Why Parliament house doesn\u2019t have a giant fire pit is beyond me.\u00a0 A few years back I took a couple of mates to a friend\u2019s hut in the high country above Lake Eucumbene.\u00a0 Being the end of term, it was the ideal setting to reflect, unload and ponder the term that was.\u00a0 With us all being heavily involved in boarding and being teachers of no great note, every story told was one that we all could relate too.<\/p>\n<p>As conversation and stories flowed, I found myself relaying an experience of a lost opportunity for a parent to help his son build resilience.\u00a0 At a Friday night, 8pm mark-off, a boy came to me quite distressed and informed me that his school bag was taken by two boys.\u00a0 I sent for the two boys and now the three boys are standing in front of me, all really good friends.\u00a0 They had been playing a game of hiding each other\u2019s bags and boys being boys, one forgot where he hid the bag and thus enters the \u2018Wisdom of Solomon\u2019, yours truly!<\/p>\n<p>I was explicitly clear to all three boys about the possible outcomes of their actions and the solutions that would be employed depending on what tomorrow brings\u2026..\u00a0 I covered all scenarios:<\/p>\n<ul>\n<li>If found with contents intact, no harm done but limbs will be removed if it happens again.<\/li>\n<li>If never found, entire contents are to be replaced by those who lost it.<\/li>\n<li>If found but bits missing, missing bits will be replaced at the cost by those who lost it.<\/li>\n<\/ul>\n<p>I used no big words and only language they understood.\u00a0 I made the three boys repeat the scenarios and outcomes and we all agreed that we understood.\u00a0 I marked them off and that was the end of it, until the next day \u2026..\u00a0 or so I thought! Within 5 minutes of the boys marking off, an email arrives demanding answers.\u00a0 Written and sent by phone before pulling away from the curb.<\/p>\n<p>This was a perfect time for the parent to practice <strong>\u2018Intelligent Neglect\u2019<\/strong>.\u00a0 If I was that parent, I would have said to my boy, <em>sort it out and get me a result that I will be happy with<\/em>.\u00a0 But instead that parent missed a perfect opportunity to teach his son problem solving skills which also help in building resilience.<\/p>\n<p>Unfortunately, in today\u2019s instant world, there is no waiting to be had, no time put aside to ponder and reflect.\u00a0 It\u2019s all driven by what I want now, not in five minutes and we are all at fault.\u00a0 The internet was slow the other day and I got impatient.\u00a0 On reflection the slowness of the internet was lightning speed compared to the internet 6 years ago but instead of instant download it took a ridiculous 3 seconds longer! \u2026.\u00a0 Where\u2019s that NBN when you need it!<\/p>\n<p>There are always going to be times when, as parents, you need to step in.\u00a0 Depending on the situation, it may be earlier rather than later, but we all need to slow down and ask ourselves, is this an opportunity for little Johnny to have one of those learning experiences that may help with his ongoing development.\u00a0 Is this a time to try <strong><em>Intelligent Neglect<\/em><\/strong>?<\/p>\n<p><figure id=\"attachment_3837\" aria-describedby=\"caption-attachment-3837\" style=\"width: 300px\" class=\"wp-caption alignleft\"><img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" class=\"wp-image-3837 size-medium\" src=\"https:\/\/www.thebuzz.net.au\/shore-boarding-news\/wp-content\/uploads\/sites\/48\/2020\/06\/Did-someone-say-Pizza-300x300.jpg\" alt=\"\" width=\"300\" height=\"300\" srcset=\"https:\/\/d1dfwahqlx324v.cloudfront.net\/uploads\/sites\/48\/2020\/06\/Did-someone-say-Pizza-300x300.jpg 300w, https:\/\/d1dfwahqlx324v.cloudfront.net\/uploads\/sites\/48\/2020\/06\/Did-someone-say-Pizza-1024x1024.jpg 1024w, https:\/\/d1dfwahqlx324v.cloudfront.net\/uploads\/sites\/48\/2020\/06\/Did-someone-say-Pizza-150x150.jpg 150w\" sizes=\"auto, (max-width: 300px) 100vw, 300px\" \/><figcaption id=\"caption-attachment-3837\" class=\"wp-caption-text\">Did someone say Pizza?<\/figcaption><\/figure> <figure id=\"attachment_3838\" aria-describedby=\"caption-attachment-3838\" style=\"width: 300px\" class=\"wp-caption alignleft\"><img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" class=\"wp-image-3838 size-medium\" src=\"https:\/\/www.thebuzz.net.au\/shore-boarding-news\/wp-content\/uploads\/sites\/48\/2020\/06\/Is-got-all-the-food-groups-300x300.jpg\" alt=\"\" width=\"300\" height=\"300\" srcset=\"https:\/\/d1dfwahqlx324v.cloudfront.net\/uploads\/sites\/48\/2020\/06\/Is-got-all-the-food-groups-300x300.jpg 300w, https:\/\/d1dfwahqlx324v.cloudfront.net\/uploads\/sites\/48\/2020\/06\/Is-got-all-the-food-groups-1024x1024.jpg 1024w, https:\/\/d1dfwahqlx324v.cloudfront.net\/uploads\/sites\/48\/2020\/06\/Is-got-all-the-food-groups-150x150.jpg 150w\" sizes=\"auto, (max-width: 300px) 100vw, 300px\" \/><figcaption id=\"caption-attachment-3838\" class=\"wp-caption-text\">It&#8217;s got all the food groups<\/figcaption><\/figure> <figure id=\"attachment_3839\" aria-describedby=\"caption-attachment-3839\" style=\"width: 300px\" class=\"wp-caption alignleft\"><img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" class=\"wp-image-3839 size-medium\" src=\"https:\/\/www.thebuzz.net.au\/shore-boarding-news\/wp-content\/uploads\/sites\/48\/2020\/06\/Mr-Junee-Mr-Walker-300x300.jpg\" alt=\"\" width=\"300\" height=\"300\" srcset=\"https:\/\/d1dfwahqlx324v.cloudfront.net\/uploads\/sites\/48\/2020\/06\/Mr-Junee-Mr-Walker-300x300.jpg 300w, https:\/\/d1dfwahqlx324v.cloudfront.net\/uploads\/sites\/48\/2020\/06\/Mr-Junee-Mr-Walker-1024x1024.jpg 1024w, https:\/\/d1dfwahqlx324v.cloudfront.net\/uploads\/sites\/48\/2020\/06\/Mr-Junee-Mr-Walker-150x150.jpg 150w\" sizes=\"auto, (max-width: 300px) 100vw, 300px\" \/><figcaption id=\"caption-attachment-3839\" class=\"wp-caption-text\">Mr Junee and Mr Walker<\/figcaption><\/figure> <figure id=\"attachment_3840\" aria-describedby=\"caption-attachment-3840\" style=\"width: 300px\" class=\"wp-caption alignleft\"><img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" class=\"wp-image-3840 size-medium\" src=\"https:\/\/www.thebuzz.net.au\/shore-boarding-news\/wp-content\/uploads\/sites\/48\/2020\/06\/SL-BBQ-300x300.jpg\" alt=\"\" width=\"300\" height=\"300\" srcset=\"https:\/\/d1dfwahqlx324v.cloudfront.net\/uploads\/sites\/48\/2020\/06\/SL-BBQ-300x300.jpg 300w, https:\/\/d1dfwahqlx324v.cloudfront.net\/uploads\/sites\/48\/2020\/06\/SL-BBQ-1024x1024.jpg 1024w, https:\/\/d1dfwahqlx324v.cloudfront.net\/uploads\/sites\/48\/2020\/06\/SL-BBQ-150x150.jpg 150w\" sizes=\"auto, (max-width: 300px) 100vw, 300px\" \/><figcaption id=\"caption-attachment-3840\" class=\"wp-caption-text\">SL BBQ<\/figcaption><\/figure> <figure id=\"attachment_3841\" aria-describedby=\"caption-attachment-3841\" style=\"width: 300px\" class=\"wp-caption alignleft\"><img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" class=\"wp-image-3841 size-medium\" src=\"https:\/\/www.thebuzz.net.au\/shore-boarding-news\/wp-content\/uploads\/sites\/48\/2020\/06\/SL-Handball-300x300.jpg\" alt=\"\" width=\"300\" height=\"300\" srcset=\"https:\/\/d1dfwahqlx324v.cloudfront.net\/uploads\/sites\/48\/2020\/06\/SL-Handball-300x300.jpg 300w, https:\/\/d1dfwahqlx324v.cloudfront.net\/uploads\/sites\/48\/2020\/06\/SL-Handball-1024x1024.jpg 1024w, https:\/\/d1dfwahqlx324v.cloudfront.net\/uploads\/sites\/48\/2020\/06\/SL-Handball-150x150.jpg 150w\" sizes=\"auto, (max-width: 300px) 100vw, 300px\" \/><figcaption id=\"caption-attachment-3841\" class=\"wp-caption-text\">SL Handball<\/figcaption><\/figure> <figure id=\"attachment_3833\" aria-describedby=\"caption-attachment-3833\" style=\"width: 300px\" class=\"wp-caption alignleft\"><img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" class=\"wp-image-3833 size-medium\" src=\"https:\/\/www.thebuzz.net.au\/shore-boarding-news\/wp-content\/uploads\/sites\/48\/2020\/06\/SL-Sunday-walk-300x300.jpg\" alt=\"\" width=\"300\" height=\"300\" srcset=\"https:\/\/d1dfwahqlx324v.cloudfront.net\/uploads\/sites\/48\/2020\/06\/SL-Sunday-walk-300x300.jpg 300w, https:\/\/d1dfwahqlx324v.cloudfront.net\/uploads\/sites\/48\/2020\/06\/SL-Sunday-walk-1024x1024.jpg 1024w, https:\/\/d1dfwahqlx324v.cloudfront.net\/uploads\/sites\/48\/2020\/06\/SL-Sunday-walk-150x150.jpg 150w\" sizes=\"auto, (max-width: 300px) 100vw, 300px\" \/><figcaption id=\"caption-attachment-3833\" class=\"wp-caption-text\">Sunday Walk<\/figcaption><\/figure> <figure id=\"attachment_3834\" aria-describedby=\"caption-attachment-3834\" style=\"width: 300px\" class=\"wp-caption alignleft\"><img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" class=\"wp-image-3834 size-medium\" src=\"https:\/\/www.thebuzz.net.au\/shore-boarding-news\/wp-content\/uploads\/sites\/48\/2020\/06\/Source-of-all-Knowledge-300x300.jpg\" alt=\"\" width=\"300\" height=\"300\" srcset=\"https:\/\/d1dfwahqlx324v.cloudfront.net\/uploads\/sites\/48\/2020\/06\/Source-of-all-Knowledge-300x300.jpg 300w, https:\/\/d1dfwahqlx324v.cloudfront.net\/uploads\/sites\/48\/2020\/06\/Source-of-all-Knowledge-1024x1024.jpg 1024w, https:\/\/d1dfwahqlx324v.cloudfront.net\/uploads\/sites\/48\/2020\/06\/Source-of-all-Knowledge-150x150.jpg 150w\" sizes=\"auto, (max-width: 300px) 100vw, 300px\" \/><figcaption id=\"caption-attachment-3834\" class=\"wp-caption-text\">Source of all knowledge<\/figcaption><\/figure> <figure id=\"attachment_3835\" aria-describedby=\"caption-attachment-3835\" style=\"width: 300px\" class=\"wp-caption alignleft\"><img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" class=\"wp-image-3835 size-medium\" src=\"https:\/\/www.thebuzz.net.au\/shore-boarding-news\/wp-content\/uploads\/sites\/48\/2020\/06\/Yr-12-Chilling.....-with-pizza-300x300.jpg\" alt=\"\" width=\"300\" height=\"300\" srcset=\"https:\/\/d1dfwahqlx324v.cloudfront.net\/uploads\/sites\/48\/2020\/06\/Yr-12-Chilling.....-with-pizza-300x300.jpg 300w, https:\/\/d1dfwahqlx324v.cloudfront.net\/uploads\/sites\/48\/2020\/06\/Yr-12-Chilling.....-with-pizza-1024x1024.jpg 1024w, https:\/\/d1dfwahqlx324v.cloudfront.net\/uploads\/sites\/48\/2020\/06\/Yr-12-Chilling.....-with-pizza-150x150.jpg 150w\" sizes=\"auto, (max-width: 300px) 100vw, 300px\" \/><figcaption id=\"caption-attachment-3835\" class=\"wp-caption-text\">Year 12 Chilling with Pizza<\/figcaption><\/figure> <figure id=\"attachment_3836\" aria-describedby=\"caption-attachment-3836\" style=\"width: 300px\" class=\"wp-caption alignleft\"><img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" class=\"wp-image-3836 size-medium\" src=\"https:\/\/www.thebuzz.net.au\/shore-boarding-news\/wp-content\/uploads\/sites\/48\/2020\/06\/Yr-12-Vs-Yr-7-well-done-Yr-7-300x300.jpg\" alt=\"\" width=\"300\" height=\"300\" srcset=\"https:\/\/d1dfwahqlx324v.cloudfront.net\/uploads\/sites\/48\/2020\/06\/Yr-12-Vs-Yr-7-well-done-Yr-7-300x300.jpg 300w, https:\/\/d1dfwahqlx324v.cloudfront.net\/uploads\/sites\/48\/2020\/06\/Yr-12-Vs-Yr-7-well-done-Yr-7-1024x1024.jpg 1024w, https:\/\/d1dfwahqlx324v.cloudfront.net\/uploads\/sites\/48\/2020\/06\/Yr-12-Vs-Yr-7-well-done-Yr-7-150x150.jpg 150w\" sizes=\"auto, (max-width: 300px) 100vw, 300px\" \/><figcaption id=\"caption-attachment-3836\" class=\"wp-caption-text\">Year 12 v&#8217;s Yr 7&#8230;well done Year 7<\/figcaption><\/figure><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>A few years back, a good mate of mine and fellow Educator (Teacher), sent me an article titled \u201cRaising Resilient Kids\u2019, the author, Michael McQueen, makes reference to a term coined by Ivy Baker Priest, an American political figure, who said \u201cMy father had always said that there are four things a child needs \u2013 [&hellip;]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"featured_media":3834,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","template":"","article_category":[],"article_tag":[9],"class_list":["post-3832","article","type-article","status-publish","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","article_tag-school-house"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.thebuzz.net.au\/shore-boarding-news\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/article\/3832","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.thebuzz.net.au\/shore-boarding-news\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/article"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.thebuzz.net.au\/shore-boarding-news\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/article"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.thebuzz.net.au\/shore-boarding-news\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=3832"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.thebuzz.net.au\/shore-boarding-news\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/3834"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.thebuzz.net.au\/shore-boarding-news\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=3832"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"article_category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.thebuzz.net.au\/shore-boarding-news\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/article_category?post=3832"},{"taxonomy":"article_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.thebuzz.net.au\/shore-boarding-news\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/article_tag?post=3832"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}