Deputy Head of Junior School – Wellbeing

I am reading a new book by Dr Justin Coulson titled Relationship Rules. It contains 85 ideas for communicating well in your relationships, especially with your children. These 85 ideas have a short explanation accompanying the idea, making it easy to read. I have enjoyed reading some of the titles of the ideas – a few which I will share below.

Love is spelled T.I.M.E.

To show our love to others takes time. Time with the person and time to listen. By truly listening we can begin to understand what is in the hearts of our loved ones. Evidence from around the world emphasises that our children thrive and our relationships flourish when we invest time.

Be where your feet are…

Be present, in the moment.

Have you ever been in conversations with people who are physically there, but are distracted, looking elsewhere, checking their device or doing something else, But not listening?

If your feet are in the kitchen in front of your five-year-old, you put your brain there too,

Stop, look, listen…

When our loved ones want our attention, we need to stop what we’re doing, look them in the eye, and listen with our hearts to be sure we really hear what they are saying to us.

Smile…

This makes people feel they are welcome and wanted. Smiling invites warmth and conversation.

Two ears, one mouth

Listen twice as much as you speak.

Take the ride, not the wheel…

When our children tell us something it can be tempting to jump in and take over the conversation. Let them stay behind the wheel and steer. You go along for the ride, listen closely, and see where they end up. Chances are that they’ll sense your trust, feel empowered, and work things out for themselves.

I hope you have enjoy ed reading just some of Dr Justin’s ideas for building and maintaining great relationships with your children (and other loved ones).

“To the world you may just be one person, but to one person you may be the world.”
– Dr Seuss

– Joanne Sharpe
Deputy Head of Junior School – Wellbeing